Children on Trains

[Dan]

Children on trains are too fucking annoying to go in the Minor Annoyances thread.

Charlotte and I were on a train yesterday, and we were the only people in the carriage. This guy and his annoying-as-fuck son walked through (he was a loud, weasly little 8 year old on crutches), and the dad says "Let's to the loo, then, and then we'll sit here", pointing at the seat directly next to ours.

Terrified at the prospect of having to sit near a fidgety, loud little prick for three hours, Charlotte and I hatched a plan. When they came back and went to sit in that chair, we started having a conversation with the most swear words in it ever. "He's such a fucking arsehole", "I know, did you see him fucking that hooker? It was such a fucking disgrace. You could see her cu--"

"Come on, Timmy. Let's move further down the train."
"I thought we were going to sit here, Daddy?"
"No no, let's move down."
"Why  are we moving down, Daddy?"
"We just are."
"But why, Da-"

We felt a bit naughty, but it worked a treat so was amazing.

What's the naughtiest thing you did this weekend?

[hatesaiko]

I hate kids in general and in cramped places in particular. Kids shouldn't be allowed outside the house before they're 18, annoying little pricks... >:(

[Ben]

The naughtiest thing I did this weekend was when I stayed over at someone's house and they let me and a female friend sleep in their absent kid's bunk-bed. We christened the bed.
Another blow against annoying brats!

[VPellen]

Ironically, one of the things that annoys me on trains is obnoxious 20-something year olds who start using profanity every other word. Particularly when it's a bunch of drunkards going on about how they "got pissed" and "fucking smashed those cunts". But in this case you were using it to deter an obnoxious brat, so it was okay.

[Dan]

Ironically, one of the things that annoys me on trains is obnoxious 20-something year olds who start using profanity every other word. Particularly when it's a bunch of drunkards going on about how they "got pissed" and "fucking smashed those cunts". But in this case you were using it to deter an obnoxious brat, so it was okay.

To be fair, we only did it for about a minute, and then went back to being frightfully middle-class.

The naughtiest thing I did this weekend was when I stayed over at someone's house and they let me and a female friend sleep in their absent kid's bunk-bed. We christened the bed.

Didn't you stay at your mum's house? And isn't your sister a 'female friend'? Ewwww, Ben.

[Ben]

You misheard me. I stayed at your mum's house. And this week, it was your dad's turn to be my 'female friend'.